The Path of Transition

2018, Creating Change, Family, grief, Joy, loss, Parenting, Toby

I’ve spent the last week swimming in baby items. Most of which were Toby’s. The switch over of the nursery has hit me in waves. I feel joy & love in my heart in places that have been so broken and painful for 25 months, it scares me. Then the pain begins and the tears fall while every sense is engaged by grief – my eyes see flashbacks to certain moments when Toby is right with me; I can smell him when drawers are opened or blankets are moved; the sound of toys that jingle or crackle take me back to the 2am feedings where he would be wide awake and the happiest baby, just wanting to laugh and watch you talk to him.

I can’t make it through a day lately where I don’t have a huge breakdown, missing Toby and wondering how on earth am I going to be able to mother our third little boy without constant fear?

I’m not sure there is an answer, enough therapy, or strong enough medication to take away the fear.

Yesterday I pulled the car seat from the basement. It was buried in the corner of the room where items that needed to be gone from site were placed two years ago. It had never been cleaned. The interior inset had spit up on it and smelled moldy & musty. Toby’s frog toy still hung from the handle. When I pulled at it, it rattled back to the top. I imagined him laughing, watching me, even though I was crying.

I spent an hour last night pulling the whole thing apart. Shouting the entire inside before placing it in the washer. I wiped down the straps and placed them in hot water to soak overnight. But I couldn’t stop thinking that this was the last place I saw my baby boy. He was in his seat, happy as can be, when I left him that morning. That evening, we brought the empty seat home. And Toby never came home.

I pulled the insert out of the washer this morning. Clean. Smelling of detergent. No sign of the marks that were there last night. Those pieces of Toby that had been there for two years were gone. I was mad at myself for cleaning it, well knowing it had to be done, but wishing to God the pain could have gone down the drain with all that other muck.

I put it all back together and brought it upstairs, setting it in the stroller in the living room. I sat on the piano bench and stared at it for a few minutes, tears welling in my eyes.

There are many days lately that I can’t believe how close we are to having our third little boy home. How quickly it went. How some days it doesn’t even feel real. Being on the cusp of 30 weeks pregnant and after doing this two times before still feeling like, “Am I ready? Can I do this?”

It’s that motherly fear.

It doesn’t go away. It manifests itself in different pockets of pregnancy and the newborn stage. We’re all afraid of something. If you don’t think you are then your lying to yourself. No one knows how to do this. No one does it perfectly. The grass is not greener on the other side.

Maybe you’re just getting more sunshine that day?

Did you ever think about it that way?

I didn’t until lately.

Through continual prayer, novenas, and the help of Toby from Heaven, I’ve been able to walk through the last few weeks, grieving when I need and for as long as I need, and focusing on myself and my boys. I know that is where my focus needs to be right now.

Two years ago, when I started writing about our journey, the word that resonated with us; described the 12 weeks and 5 days we had; and also symbolizes how we made it through another day without Toby, is JOY.

#joyfortobystern became our rock and became a trend that was spread across the US to share Toby’s story. The impact it had on everyone who read about Toby or saw his picture was remarkable to see and many times we witnessed how Toby brought JOY to others, in their time of need.

Toby and his JOY are with our family now as we stand at the doorstep of another chapter for our family.

I have faith that God will see us through.

I have faith that Toby will guard our family with his army of Angels.

I have no doubt that we will experience JOY again in the coming months and it will be delivered by our blue-eyed angel, Toby, who sits at His Thrown and is now protected by His graces for eternity.

I have faith that Toby’s JOY will support us as we wade through memories of him and make new memories with our third little boy. As we transition from #ourfamilyoffour to #ourfamilyoffive.

To The Parents Preparing For School to Begin – A Note From A Grieving Family

2018, Creating Change, Family, grief, Lucas, Parenting, Toby

Lucas will start Pre-K this fall. With his first school application, we had to write a letter about our family. I was absolutely not ready for this. I knew we’d have to do it one day and know this is only the start of these conversations with teachers, administration, coaches, and families that we will meet along the way. But the triggers it brought were another layer of grief we were not prepared for.

The administration was very welcoming and told us that one of the first things classes do is a family tree, which also has a discussion about family amongst the children and asked if Luke would be comfortable with the conversation. I both cried and beamed with joy.

Luke is so proud of Toby. He may not say that exactly, but he talks about him multiple times daily, includes him in his stories and games and in his prayers at night. I have no doubt he will proudly talk about Toby during family discussions and projects at school.

Lucas & Toby – July 2016

I saw this article from Today Show and it triggered the tears. I don’t even have to read the article. We’re not even there yet, Toby would only be 2. But I know this will be me in two years and every year after that, for the next 20.

Every sport, every play, every class project, he will visually be missing from the class of 2034, but I know I will watch that Class and wonder he would be.

My mothering heart prays that school, classmates, and other parents will be kind to my little boys. This is our family, not by choice, God knows. These boys are our life and we will talk about them proudly, holding Luke & our Rainbow tightly and doing the same with Toby’s memory.

If by chance your family has a grieving family in your class, whether you know from the first day of school or don’t learn about it until mid-year, please be kind.

You may not understand. We don’t expect you to. We just ask for you to be kind to our boys – they don’t know any different and to them, we aren’t different. Luke is a big brother. Toby is his little brother, who to him loves baseball and the color green.

And if you really want to experience something amazing, take a moment to ask Luke about Toby. You may just find yourself hugging your own kiddos a little tighter that evening and thanking God for the blessings you get to kiss goodnight and tuck into bed each evening.

Remember, we are a family, just like you.

One of our sons just got called home a little sooner, to do God’s work.

Article from Today
Author: Jennifer Swartvagher

Dear Kindergarten teacher: My son will be absent on the first day of school

PSA: Spend the Money. Buy the Owlet.

2018, Creating Change, Family, grief, loss, Parenting, The Little Fox | Toby's Foundation, Toby

Over the past week, I have been asked multiple times about the Owlet Baby Monitors.

Are they worth it?
Should I spend the money?
I’m on the fence about this monitor, but…

What is unspoken is the BUT in each of these instances.

But, I don’t want to have to worry about my infant while they are sleeping.
But, I don’t want to have to continually check if they are breathing.
But, I don’t want to have additional anxiety overnight times or naps.
But, I don’t want to be you.

I don’t take offense to that last statement.

Believe me. I don’t want to be me either. Every morning I wake up and look at Toby’s face on my nightstand, instead of going in and getting him out of his bed. Every day I put shoes on one child, instead of two. Every day I drop one little boy off at daycare, instead of both of my boys. Every night we pick one set of books to read before bed, instead of having to compromise on two books for two little boys favorites. And, every night we say prayers and we have to tell Toby we love him without seeing him and “We hope you had a good day in Heaven.”

No one wants to be this mom. This family. No one wants this life. No one.

Yes, the Owlet is expensive. But it could alert you and tell you if there’s something wrong with your infant.

Yes, $300 is a lot of money. Owlet offers payment plans if you cannot purchase in full. They have also worked to accept FSA’s through some provider’s health plans across the US. If you don’t know if yours will cover it – contact Owlet and ask. 1-844-334-5330.

From a family who has done the whole shower/registry list – if you are contemplating placing one of these monitors on your list of needed items – do it. Skip the swing or the bouncer. Family and friends are more likely to purchase one of the more expensive items because these are normally must-have items for a baby. The Owlet Smart Sock is a must-have.

http://www.owletcare.com

The Owlet is able to tell you heart rate and oxygen levels; sleep trends; red notification reports to view and talk with your doctor about what led to the red notification, and all of this data can be instantly shared with your family or doctors. Every single day.

Yes, they say that the first three months of an infant’s life are the most vulnerable. The Owlet can be used up to 1 year old – imagine not having that anxiety for 12 months.

We have spent the last month talking to a number of daycares in the Pittsburgh area who have never used a device like the Owlet, but are open to the conversation and once they have learned what it can offer their families and staff that care for infants each day, they are receptive to having these in their programs. This is another step in offering families “peace of mind” when they have to leave their little ones each day and go to work.

The Little Fox – Toby’s Foundation will continue to push this conversation and the importance of using this monitor with your infant, starting right here in the Pittsburgh area. That is part of our mission – to promote Safe Sleep and to educate others about safe sleep practices and the tools available to families to try and prevent a SIDS death.

This is our mission because this is our life. Toby may have only been here 12 weeks and 5 days, but his life and his memory will make a difference to the lives of others. I know our son’s impact is far from over and as grieving parents, it is our job to keep his memory alive and help prevent our grieving parents’ circle from getting bigger.

If you have questions about the Owlet or any of the organizations across the US that are partnering with Owlet, like The Little Fox – Toby’s Foundation, please contact us. We would be happy to talk with you about the device and any open application calls that we know of to possibly receive an Owlet for your family for free.

thelittlefoxfoundation@gmail.com

www.thelittlefoxfoundation.org

If you need confirmation from someone else on the importance of this device, check out Jessica Alba’s interview with InStyle Magazine on Parenting Tips – skip to 1:36.

https://www.instyle.com/videos/jessica-alba-parenting-tips-breast-pumping

21 months & Lots of Prayers

2018, Creating Change, Family, grief, Joy, loss, The Little Fox | Toby's Foundation, Toby

Guys! It’s official – The Little Fox | Toby’s Foundation is incorporated & approved! 🦊

In just two weeks time all of our paperwork was reviewed and approved. We were told to not expect anything for 6-8 weeks. As soon as I started to read the letter last night I thought “This is all Toby’s doing. He’s opening doors again!”

He knows his momma and she can’t wait for anything, especially when there’s work to be done, families to help, and lives to save.

I laid down with Luke at bedtime last night and as we said prayers, thanking God for another step in this journey, and saying goodnight to Toby, this came through my thoughts…

“Get some rest momma. We have lots of work to do.”

By God’s hand and Toby’s guidance, we’re going to make a difference with The Little Fox. There are many hopes & dreams for this nonprofit and our plan is to take it one day at a time. There will be opportunities that are a perfect fit and others that will not work for us. We will do our best to make the right decisions and help as many families and children as possible.

Thank you to every single person that has helped us over the last 21 months. Without the support, comfort and encouragement of our family, friends, neighbors, community, local businesses, other grief families, other memorial foundations, doctors, Owlet, and every anonymous, kind hearted person that has found a way to touch our hearts and to help our family – THANK YOU!! We would not be here, if it weren’t for all of you.

Stayed tuned to see what we’ll be working on next. We’re currently matching donations for the Owlet Smart Socks in the Pittsburgh area to be donated over the next few weeks. Then, our focus will turn to August. With our Foundation Board established, we’ll be working together on an event for August where we hope to see many of you. We will also be doing our “Random Acts of Kindness” campaign, which will kick off August 1. We hope to see as many participants as last year and see the ways that Toby’s joy can travel around the world.

Please keep our family in your prayers as we approach Toby’s 2nd Birthday on May 27. This does not get any easier as the months go by. Our hearts remain broken, missing Toby beyond belief. We know the best way to honor our son is to help others and share the joy that he gave our family with those children and families. That is what we are doing and will continue to do.

God Bless,

The Sterns ❤️

#thelittlefox #joyfortobystern #SIDS #journeythroughgrief #august24 #ourangeltoby

Finding Our Footing in 2018

2017, 2018, Creating Change, Family, grief, Joy, loss, Marriage, Parenting, Toby

As I sit in our home on the last day of 2017, my heart is fragile. This holiday season has been hard. The reality of Toby being gone, forever, was ever present over the past few weeks. Where many experienced cheer and love, we felt abandonment and sadness.

It is hard to believe 2017 is nearly over. A full year without our son. No hugs or kisses. No first steps. No presents for Toby under the tree. As we stood in the cold on Christmas Day at the foot of Toby’s grave, I kept thinking to myself – I never could have imagined this is how we’d spend our holidays. Why is this our life? I fought like hell to find all the excitement and happiness I could for the holidays, it exhausted me.

We spent the last few days holed up in our house, doing a whole lot of nothing. Surprisingly, it was refreshing. We watched a lot of movies. We played in the snow with Luke, Murray & Theo. I read a lot – posts, articles, and books. I came across a passage yesterday in my reading that has been on my heart since.

Through this past year, while trying to spread Toby’s joy with as many as possible, I have continued to carry a heavy piece of grief with me. It has darkened my days and tested my relationship with God. I have sat at Toby’s grave; on my knees at the foot of the cross; and continually on my drive to work when I’m alone in the car asking “Why? Why would You take Toby? Why did this happen to our family?” This question has become a staple in my devotionals for our family and our healing. I hear this question in the midst of everyday routines. Well knowing that I will never have an answer, until the day I am standing in Heaven with Toby back in my arms.

Yesterday, I came upon this passage while reading:

“We have no right to ask

When sorrow comes,

Why did this happen to me?

Unless we ask the same question

For every joy that comes our way.”

-Philip S. Bernstein

This passage led me back to something that was given to me, by my mom, a few months ago. It is a song title ‘Glorious Unfolding.’ She had given me the CD to listen to. Instead, we Google’d the song and found the video to go with it. This song is emotional, and I can imagine, it can take on many meanings for those struggling – with anything – with death; with illness; with job loss; with financial insecurity; with family turmoil; with marriage struggles; with stumbles you may have had in the past year.

There’s a message for you in this. Open your heart, quiet your mind, and listen.

Glorious Unfolding – Steven Curtis Chapman

I have no idea what 2018 holds. This past year held moments of JOY that I do not want to let go of. They were moments from Toby, that I know he delivered to us. I felt it. There were moments of pure excitement and happiness with Luke that I thanked God, repeatedly for.

My one hope for 2018 is that I can loosen the grip on this question to which there is no answer – “Why?” And in trying to do that, help us see more of the Joy that God is placing in our path. I have to believe it is there. There is no other choice.

I know that this will not be easy. Grief is hard. It is ruthless. For grieving parents, the reality of a child dying, never goes away. But life continues to move forward. Things change.

Our path has changed, our journey has been altered. We must now find our footing on this path and keep climbing. I am not sure where we are going – figuratively or literally. And I know this will not be easy. It will not be without hurt and tears. But I pray that on our climb we find places to rest, recharge, grieve, and enjoy our family – all four of us.

Here we come, 2018, with joy in hand. Be gentle on us.

2017 Stuff-a-Truck – Success!

2017, Creating Change, faith, Family, Joy, The Little Fox | Toby's Foundation, Toby

It has taken us a few days to come down from the incredible high that we were on from each and every person that helped make our 2017 Stuff-a-Truck event a HUGH success!

The temperatures weren’t exactly on our side when we woke up on Sunday, but we piled on the layers and when Dave & Rachel pulled up in front of our house the adrenaline kicked in and that was all we needed. I remember walking around the side of the garage and seeing the truck – I got a lump in my throat and as I walked up the driveway I had tears in my eyes. There was a gigantic truck sitting there and the reality of what we were about to do was sinking in. This is BIG.

We started loading up everything that was in our garage – donations from our professional connections, North American Martyrs/St. Michael’s Parish, neighbors and friends. Standing there watching boxes and items go into the truck, my mom stood beside me. We looked at each other and she said “You may need another truck.” Again, another overwhelming moment and feeling of determination. You may have heard it in my voice in the video below – we were going to fill that truck. I had no doubt in my mind.

Don Farr Moving Truck Arrival

Volunteers arrived at Dad’s Pub & Grub at 11 and we got everything set up. We had nearly a dozen people that stayed the entire time to help. There were 8-10 people volunteering each hour and you’d never even know there was a “changing of the guard” because these amazing people had things moving like a well oiled machine.

Donation drop-off started at noon and by 12:40 – the truck looked like this:

By 1 o’clock there was a line of cars out on Northern Pike waiting to pull in to donate. It was amazing to see!

Around 2PM two things happened that brought the tears – (#1) Channel 11 showed up to video what was happening. They asked us about Toby’s story and Play it Forward and where all these donations were going. Talk about a proud parent moment. At one point, I looked over my shoulder and a van had pulled up and they were opening the back doors. (This is thing #2) Triangle Bar & Grill from Swissvale was delivering 10 (TEN) NEW BIKES! Volunteers helped them upload each bike and set them up to the side of the truck. I stood there looking at them – with no words. This was incredible and gracious.

Not only were there lines of people outside – Dad’s was packed inside, too with families that came to drop off and then when in for lunch. And everyone rocked their Steelers gear for the game that evening!

Our event was scheduled to run until 3PM and by 2:45 – our 26ft truck – was STUFFED!

It was incredible. By the time the volunteers place all the big items – train tables; large doll houses; picnic and water tables; a few pieces of furniture; and then put in all the bikes that were dropped off – there was just enough room to close the door.

Can you believe that? I stood there looking at the back of that truck as they were finishing and heard this little voice “We did it, Mommy. Just enough.”

How did that happen? It happened through the hope of a grieving family. It happened because Toby’s JOY is meant to be a part of many lives.

We even got to have a little bit of fun during the day and enjoy our time with everyone that came out. Although, Luke was a little chilly.

A few shout-outs to some key players that helped us bring this event together –

Dad’s Pub & Grub – Northern Pike in Monroeville. If you haven’t been there, get in to see Dan and his team over the holidays. The food is amazing and they have great beer, too. We couldn’t have done this without the prime location and there amazing support and encouragement from the very beginning.
Don Farr Moving – Dan, Rachel, Frank and the rest of the team from Don Farr that provided the truck; the packing supplies; and the labor to fill the truck to the brim. Then, on Monday, they delivered the truckload of donations to the Convention Center downtown Pittsburgh to kick-off Play it Forward Pittsburgh’s Toy Donations.
Simmons Farm – a part of our extended family, Simmons Farm served as a “pop-up” location for donations the week leading up to our Stuff-a-Truck event. Their efforts from donors in the South Hills area loaded another truck to deliver to Play it Forward.
Every Volunteer – there are WAY too many to name, but please know we are thankful for every minute and every way you were able to support us during the past month. We could not have done this without your support.
Grandma, Pup, Nana & PapPap – First, thank you for watching Luke so he didn’t have to brave the cold temperature. Second, thank you, and our immediate family members, for continually supporting whatever crazy idea we dream up, especially the ones that support keeping Toby’s memory alive and helping our dream of The Little Fox | Toby’s Foundation come to reality.
Last, but certainly not least, Play it Forward Pittsburgh – Heather & Amy – Thank you for allowing our family to contribute to this beautiful and amazing cause that you have created here in Pittsburgh. It has been an honor to support Play it Forward, in memory of Toby, and see the amount of people who want to get behind it in the future. You both have created something amazing – we are glad to be able to be a part of it.

Dan & I were able to volunteer on Play it Foward’s Shop Day – Saturday, December 16 at the Convention Center downtown Pittsburgh. Leading up to that day, Shady Side Academy’s 3rd Grade class took a field trip and helped sort toys. Then, the following day, my company, A. Martini & Co., volunteered in the afternoon. We are lucky to have the support of our colleagues on this journey.

Here are some photos of the set-up on Friday, prior to the doors opening on Saturday morning. There were people lined up outside on Friday night at 8PM to shop Saturday morning – it was incredible.

Play it Forward Pittsburgh’s Shop Day started at 8AM and by 3PM the tables were completely empty. (See below)

Also, Play it Forward was able to offer some statistics on the 2017 drive – please take a look, these are incredible:

Thank you – Thank you – Thank you! To every single person that contributed to this cause. Whether it was through our Stuff-a-Truck event or another donation location. Your time & toys helped give toys to 4,500 children! What an incredible way to GIVE this Christmas.

We are grateful for the opportunities that have come our way in 2017 that have allowed us to continue telling Toby’s story and spreading his JOY, not just across Pittsburgh, but across the nation. They have given us strength to continue. We truly believe that his story is far from over. It is up to us, as his parents, to carry his legacy.

We stand at the door of another year – without Toby in our arms. But their are pieces of my son everywhere I look. I hear them; I see them; I feel them. Thank you for helping us make it through 2017 with joy in our hearts.

Wishing all of you a Merry Christmas and JOY for 2018!

Love,

Dan, Katie, Lucas & Toby

Simmons Farm Hosts Toy Donation Pop-Up Locations

2017, Creating Change, Family, Joy, The Little Fox | Toby's Foundation, Toby

To our South Hills Family & Friends:

Simmons Farm will be hosting a “pop up” donation drop to benefit Play it Forwards 2017 Toy Drive at both their Market & Rt. 19 locations.

Toy donations will be accepted December 4-10, from 9am-5pm.

See the full post below and a huge “Thank You” to our Simmons Farm Family for helping to support Play it Forward Pittsburgh, in Toby’s memory. ❤️

—

Simmons Farm Toy Drop Location

In Memory of our nephew Toby Stern, who passed away last August at 12 weeks old:

Are you looking to donate your gently used toys that your children may have outgrown or are looking to purge before Santa arrives in a few weeks? From Monday, December 4-Sunday, December 10 Simmons Farm will be a “pop-up” location to benefit Play it Forward Pittsburgh. Our Rt. 19 and Farm locations will take donations from 9-5pm.

For more information on items that can be donated or materials requested to help with Play it Forward’s Toy Drive, visit: http://www.playitforwardpittsburgh.com/donate–help.html

Our collection will support the efforts of The Little Fox|Toby’s Foundation, who is spear-heading a ‘Stuff-a-Truck’ event in Monroeville on December 10, in memory of Toby.

We are happy to offer a South Hills drop location to families who can’t travel to Monroeville for the donation event, but would like to support local Pittsburgh children in need this holiday season.

Stuff-a-Truck for Play it Forward Pittsburgh

2017, Creating Change, Family, Joy, The Little Fox | Toby's Foundation, Toby

Our partnerships with the Monroeville Community continue to grow and we couldn’t be more proud of this next opportunity – and it’s a big one!

The Little Fox | Toby’s Foundation is happy to announce that on Sunday, December 10 we are partnering with Dad’s Pub and Grub in Monroeville to host a Stuff-a-Truck event to benefit Play it Forward Pittsburgh!

Stuff A Truck_Event Flyer_social media

It is our way of spreading Toby’s Joy again this holiday season as we join forces with Play it Forward Pittsburgh and the Monroeville Community, for the second year in a row.

We are looking to collect your gently used toys that your family is looking to re-home prior to Santa arriving or family gift exchanges through the holiday season. If you are looking to purge some toys and children’s items, please collect them and help us Stuff-a-Truck for children in the Pittsburgh community. Donate your toys to be given to a family in need this holiday season!

Play it Forward will accept items for children, ages 0-16. Items requested include:

toys – books – games

electronics – sporting equipment – bikes – movies (dvd only)

Also needed: gallon ziploc bags – white kitchen size garbage bags – packing tape – boxes

Please remember to organize and bag your toys together so they are ready to go and the pieces don’t get separated. Please do not wrap toys.

Below is an event flyer, which you can download for inviting others to join in the collection.

Stuff A Truck_Event Flyer

Play it Forward Pittsburgh’s Shop Day is Saturday, December 16 at the David L. Lawrence Convention Center, 8am – 3pm. Families are welcome to choose 3 toys and 3 books, per child, for free.

Currently there are no drop off/collection locations for the 2017 event to the West of Pittsburgh. This is another reason we are holding this event. We are hoping to gather all the toys in one collection day from the Monroeville/Murrysville area, but we need your help!

Please share our posts and flyer with as many as possible. Church groups, daycare facilities, Mom/Dad groups, Pediatrician offices, local businesses and community groups are all excellent places to share this event to get the word out to our community.

For more information on Play it Forward Pittsburgh, visit: www.playitforwardpittsburgh.com

Any questions regarding this event, please contact The Little Fox | Toby’s Foundation via email: thelittlefoxfoundation@gmail.com.

We look forward to seeing you all on Sunday, December 10 at Dad’s Pub & Grub in Monroeville.

Small Businesses Providing Hope

2017, Creating Change, grief, loss

I wanted to take a moment, in the month of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness, and spotlight a few small businesses that offer some amazing items for families that are grieving.

Some of these I have been a recipient of one or more of their items, some I’ve bought for our own home, and some I am regularly swooning over their amazing talents.

Many of these businesses were created to honor a loss – either of their own child/children, a family member, or someone in their community.

If you know anyone that is grieving this Holiday Season, please consider one of these shops. Their gifts, I know from personal experience, can offer comfort, support and encouragement in a time of year that those in the bereavement community often feel so alone and very sad.

laurelbox

laurelbox – www.laurelbox.com
Luminous Light Studio – http://luminouslightstudio.com/
A Thread Runs Thru It – www.athreadrunsthruit.etsy.com
Mint + Birch Jewelry – www.mintandbirch.com/collections/forever-mama

Luminous Light Studio

I would love to hear from others! What have you received that you’ve really loved or what have you gifted to someone who is grieving that you’ve found to be helpful and appreciated?

Book Drive in Memory of Toby

2017, Creating Change, Family, Joy, Toby

-Benefiting the Monroeville Public Library Children’s Section-

We are working with the Monroeville Library to donate a set of books to their Children’s Section in memory of our son, Toby. This is another way for Toby’s joy and happiness to be spread to families and children within our community.

The library has been generous in working with us on this project and provided titles from their “wish list” for the Children’s Section.

We have created a list via Amazon with these books on it. If anyone is interested in purchasing one of the books on this list you may purchase and/or view from the link below.

Toby Stern’s Memorial Book List

There are 20 titles on the list. We are requesting that you purchase directly from this list so that only 1 copy is purchased of each book and we can keep track of which ones are still available. Once it is purchased, it will no longer be on the list.

The list is set up so that the books will be sent to our home. Once we receive all the purchased books, we will coordinate drop-off and the plaque that will go inside the cover of each book, in our little boys memory.

If you wish to have your name or your family’s name on the donation plaque, please put a note in the purchase from Amazon or send us an email directly (ourhappyplaceandco@gmail.com) with the name of the book you purchased, what you would like the message to say and we will make sure it gets done.

Thank you to Monroeville Library for allowing us the opportunity to make such a generous donation in Toby’s memory.

memorial book list_toby

Any questions, please contact us via the website, social media or email (listed above).

Please do not contact the library directly. We have arranged to coordinate this drive on our own and can answer any questions you may have.

Thank you in advance for your interest in this project and for participating in this book donation in memory of Toby Stern.

–The Sterns

Our Happy Place & Co.

Wherever this journey takes us, we're going to enjoy the ride.

Creating Change